How I Imagine The Flight to the Virgin Islands Will Transpire

(We place our bags in the overhead bin and settle into our seats.)

Me:
When’s the last time we rode a plane together?

Him:
(something unintelligible)

Me:
Have we ever been on a plane together? Oh! Cancun. That’s right.

(He pulls out a wood sculpture and his whittling tools.)

Me:
You’re going to whittle on the plane?! Dude!

Him:
They won’t notice.

Me:
(sigh) Give me a kiss, baby. Wait. Did you brush your teeth?

Him:
I forgot.

Me:
You gotta brush your teeth!

Him:
I keep forgetting.

Me:
I’m going to read now.